


The Cuckoo’s Nest

by Arya_Skywalker



Category: Birds of Prey (And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) (2020), Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Gotham city, Alternate Universe - Human, Creativity | Roman “Princey” Sanders has anger issues, Deceit | Janus Sanders is CEO of Janus Corp, Everyone’s a villain or anti-hero, Janus is Roman and Remus’s father, M/M, Not so healthy family relationships, Swearing, but no one is completely unsympathetic, night club, past abusive relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-25
Updated: 2021-01-25
Packaged: 2021-03-17 23:34:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28982694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arya_Skywalker/pseuds/Arya_Skywalker
Summary: Janus sighed and looked at Remus. “You blew up one of our plants. Why? Are you angry at me for something?”Remus wrinkled his nose. “Nah, not at you,” he grumbled.“You don’t deny blowing it up. If you’re not angry at me, then why?”Remus picked at his neon shirt hem. “Cuz that’s where Puddin’ an’ I met, an’ we broke up, so I was sad and mad at him, an’ I was drunk so I thought it was a good idea.”Roman scoffed. “When are you not drunk?”(AU where I replace most Birds of Prey characters with Sanders Sides characters and tweak until I’m happy with the result. One of the main changes being Harley!Remus and Sionis!Roman are both Janus’s sons.)
Relationships: Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Deceit | Janus Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Sleep | Remy Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders & Deceit | Janus Sanders
Kudos: 5
Collections: TSS Fanworks Collective





	The Cuckoo’s Nest

**Author's Note:**

> Fun fact: this AU started simply because I thought it amusing that there was a character named Roman and a company named Janus Corp in Birds of Prey, so obviously I had to make it into a thing. 
> 
> Thanks to the TSS Fanworks Collective for bouncing ideas around, especially vorpal for the initial brainstorming sessions.
> 
> List of characters (none are exact matches, but for reference):  
> Roman as Roman Sionis  
> Remus as Harley Quinn  
> Janus as Remus and Roman’s dad, CEO of Janus Corp   
> Remy as Victor  
> Virgil as Cassandra Cain  
> Logan as Helena  
> Patton as the detective (slightly changed to be the Only Good Cop in Gotham)  
> Thomas as Black Canary (background singer, not too involved with plot)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Janus issues an ultimatum, Remus and Roman are not happy with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Janus, Roman, Remus, and Remy are in this chapter. Other characters will be introduced later.

Janus sighed, staring out the window at the streets of Gotham. At the ruins of one of his many his chemical processing plants. Of course it had to Remus’s fault, not some lowly thug that he could kill off. Why did everything need to be so complicated?

“Sir, your sons are here,” a servant said from the door.

“Let them in.” Janus gestured vaguely, then rubbed his brow as his sons’ voices drifted through the halls.

“Stop pushing me!” Remus whined.

“I’m not pushing you. I’m simply walking. You’re the one who keeps weaving into my path,” Roman retorted.

“Bitch.”

“Slut.”

Janus cleared his throat and turned to face them. “Please, sit down,” he said, gesturing to the two chairs in front of his desk before taking a seat in his own throne-like office chair.

“Yes, Father,” they said in unison, taking their seats without protest.

“Do you know why I called you here?” Janus asked, steepling his hands on his desk.

Remus fidgeted a bit. “Whatever I did, sorry, daddy,” he mumbled.

Roman rolled his eyes. “If it’s about his fuck-ups, I fail to see why I need to be here.”

Janus sighed and looked at Remus. “You blew up one of our plants. Why? Are you angry at me for something?”

Remus wrinkled his nose. “Nah, not at you,” he grumbled.

“You don’t deny blowing it up. If you’re not angry at me, then why?”

Remus picked at his neon shirt hem. “Cuz that’s where Puddin’ an’ I met, an’ we broke up, so I was sad and mad at him, an’ I was drunk so I thought it was a good idea.”

Roman scoffed. “When are you not drunk?”

“When are _you_ not drunk, huh?” Remus retorted.

Janus clapped his gloved hands to get their attention. “BOYS! Enough. Remus, you will make up what the damages cost by working at Roman’s club—“

“Wait, what? No! Please, dad—“ they protested in unison.

Janus held up his hand. “No fighting. I have made up my mind. It’s time you two acted like brothers.”

Remus slumped in his chair, sliding halfway down. “This sucks! I don’t wanna _work_ at a club! I wanna enjoy the clubs!”

“You will still have access to the entertainment, although I hope you don’t drink on your shift,” Janus said coolly.

“Dad, c’mon, he can’t do anything right! He’ll just bring the business down!” Roman protested.

“Hey! I can do some things right!”

“Oh yeah? Like what?”

“Blow shit up!”

“And that’s so useful at a fucking club.”

“C’mon, I know you wanna blow some places up! I could be your blower-upper!”

“That’s not a thing.”

Janus cleared his throat. “You need to learn how to work together,” he said. “I will check in on you both to see your progress. You may go.”

Roman groaned and got up, waving before heading out.

Remus bit his lip. “I _am_ sorry, daddy,” he said quietly.

Janus sighed and stood. “I know, sweetie. And I’m sorry it didn’t work out between you and the Joker.” He hesitated a moment, then awkwardly held out his arms as an invitation for a hug. He never was big on physical affection, but Remus had practically been a puppy when he was younger.

Remus dove into his arms, sobbing messily and clinging to his suit. “I miss him.”

Janus rubbed his back gently, making a mental note to get his suit washed as soon as the boys left. “There, there. You’ll find someone new when you’re ready. You always do.” He waited for his son’s crying to subside, then patiently led him outside himself, waving off the escorts. “This is another chance for you, little one. All you need to do is hold a job long enough to pay for repairs.”

Remus wiped his face with the back of his hand and nodded. “I’ll try,” he mumbled.

“That’s my boy,” Janus said, smiling wanly and patting Remus’s back. “Now, go catch up with your brother. Wouldn’t want him leaving without you.”

“Toodles!” Remus said, spinning on his heel and waving before running towards Roman’s bright red convertible.

Janus sighed, watching them go. Idiots. But they were still family— even if they never acted like it.

~*~

Remus dived into the backseat with a grin. “Ready when you are, bro!”

Roman jumped. “What the fuck?” he hissed.

“Don’t worry, babe, I’ll kick him out if he doesn’t move,” Remy said, lowering his sunglasses to glare at Remus through the rear-view mirror.

Remus giggled. “Nope! Daddy says I gotta go with you!”

Roman groaned. “Fine, fine, just buckle up so you don’t fly out.”

“Party pooper.” Remus stuck out his tongue, but sat up and buckled up.

“I don’t like you,” Roman muttered.

“Feelin’s mutual, bro. But you know daddy’s word is law.”

“Will you stop calling him that?”

Remus snickered. “Why? He’s our daddy! Our dad, pops, papa, father!”

“Oh my god, just shut up already!”

Remus bit his tongue, but went quiet, fiddling with the window controls to distract himself. 

Roman ran a hand through his hair. “Remy, take us home to the club. Casual. No need to run lights or whatever.”

“You got it, babe.” Remy started the car and drove off.

Remus drummed his fingers on the door, humming absently. After a few minutes, he spoke up, “I’m bored. Are we there yet?”

“No. Shut up,” Roman replied flatly.

“So what am I gonna do at this stupid club of yours?”

“We’ll figure it out when we get there. I said, shut up.”

“You can’t hurt me! Dad said we gotta get along.”

“Remy, pull over.”

The car skidded to a stop near a convenient alley.

“Out. Get out!” Roman snapped, pointing to the alley. 

Remus blinked. “But... but dad said—“

“I know what he said!” Roman practically ripped off his seatbelt and stumbled out of the car. “C’mon, out!”

Remus stared at him for a moment, then shrugged and got out of the car, following his twin. “What are we doing here? It’s a dump. Didn’t think that was your thing.” He giggled a bit.

Roman grabbed the collar of Remus’s shirt and shoved him against the wall. “Listen closely. You’re working for me now, which means you do as I say when I say it.”

Remus flinched, holding up his hands. “Okay, okay, geez!”

“I’m not done talking. Shut up.” Roman glared at him. “Neither of us want this. If you slack off work, my other employees will wonder why I don’t punish you. But if I hurt you, father will be displeased.” He paused, glancing at his hands and quickly letting go. “So, you will be on your best behavior when on shift. I don’t care what you do off shift. But while I’m paying you, you _behave_. Got it?” He crossed his arms.

Remus swallowed and nodded quickly. “Y-yeah. I got it. No problems here.” _Lots of problems. Behaving is so boring!_

“Good. Glad we agree.” Roman fixed his suit and his hair. “I’ll start you off as a waiter, I guess. Simple enough work.”

“Can I wear a sexy outfit?” Remus asked with a smirk.

Roman facepalmed. “Fine! Just... don’t piss off any of my customers.”

Remus grinned and did finger-guns. “Awesome sauce! Let’s go!”

_How to get over a breakup, step who-the-fuck-knows: reconnect with family and get a “real” job_


End file.
